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December 16

12 December 07 \ 13:09: Inner core temperature drop sensed.

Outer shell temperature increase of 5 degrees also noted.

14:48: Propulsion systems start to experience catastrophic cascade

failure.

15:36: Emergency power at maximum; but unsustainable.

18:14: Warp containment is at critical mass, communications are

garbled and unintelligible, Life Support seems to be all but depleted.

18:30: On nothing more than the proverbial ‘Wing and a prayer’,

docking procedures are finally completed.

Garbled transmission to command center:

‘Honey………….I’m Sicky!

We have had the black quarantine flag flying over our house for almost a month now. Three days after Thanksgiving, my wife came down with a nasty combination of grievous maladies that had her at home and off her feet for about a week, and only with the help of mystical pharmaceuticals, was she able to once again join the ranks of the miserably employed.

One week later found me, near the end of my workday, suddenly feeling that inner chill that can only mean one thing: Throat lozenges and Nyquil will be my main staples for the next day or two. I’m not one to call in sick because I don’t want to go into work, but when I get sick, even the slightest bit; I make sure I stay home. I hate it when people ‘tuff it out’ and go to work because they are (please choose any that apply):

Need the money.
Committed to their job.
Trying to stay on management’s short ‘Atta Boy’ list.
In belief that we cannot survive without them.
Selfish ignorant jerkoffs

If you chose #5, then you are correct.

I can truly empathize with #1; I have been there as a child watching a parent struggle with that dilemma and also as an adult, when I was in the hourly workforce. I may get angry and not like it one bit, but I also cannot fault their decision to go to work.

Everyone else automatically falls into the #5 category.

All you #2’s out there; I don’t care if you are Gods gift to the corporation, you come into work sick makes you a jackass. Hey all you #3’s; If you are looking for a spotlight to be placed on you from on high, trust me, when everyone else is out sick and you are remembered as being ‘Patient Zero’, you will have more spotlight on you than you would ever care for.

And you #4’s, please remember that the old adage rings true: ‘Distance makes the heart grow fonder’.

When I get sick, I usually blow it off in a day or two at the max. I attribute this to strong Celtic genes, the proper usage of miraculous healing waters and oatmeal cookies. However, even the best preventive maintenance will still see breakdowns occur, such as is the case now. I have a sore throat that is making its way into my ears, a fever and a cough that even when I can find a comfortable moment to doze off, prevents me from doing just that. My dreams have been very strange and forgotten at the moment of consciousness, with the exception that the underlying theme seems to be about twos; One being good and the other being tainted.

The one dream I do remember was not so much a dream as a fusion between real and unreal.

Let me explain:

The other night I was watching the 400^th item on TV since I was quarantined to the bedroom. Reading was too much a chore and writing was totally out of the question, so the ‘Sucker of Souls’ was the only thing available to me that I would not need to work at (except for the remote, and I was still man enough to be able to do that). The movie was ‘Jack and the beanstalk; the true story’, which turned out to be an enjoyable movie. The very short of it is that a modern day descendant of the original stalk climber, must return the gifted goose and the magic harp back to the land where it came from, in order to lift a fatal family curse. As all good movies go, Jack succeeds in his quest and everyone lives happily ever after.

Sometime during the night while once again enveloped inside a dream, I was struggling with this problem: If the goose that lays the golden eggs and the magical harp were returned to the magical castle in the sky, as I know they were, why is it that my throat still hurts?

It seemed like the entire night saw me struggling with this perplexing mystery.

1:47 PM | Blog it

Comments (6)

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	W. Mitchellwrote: Having spent the better part of 2007 commuting by airline, I am at a loss for what to call those people who will get on a plane and not even cover their mouth when hacking, sneezing and wheezing. Pond scum seems to fit. #5 works too! Mar. 7
	Siobhan Wilsonwrote: I hate you. Even when you're sick and full of nasty wee germs, you still crack me up. The beginning og the blog sounded like something my hubby would have written (i.e. seems as though you're a geek too). And why oh WHY is it that when I took the day off work when I was sick that the only film on TV was Glitter (Mariah Carey). If you haven't seen it, please save yourself from a bad experience. Yet, for some reason, I had to sit through its entirety just to make sure it really was bad. Hope you're feeling spritely soon. Dec. 21
	Anitrawrote: I love this post! Usually it's the male who needs oober amounts of attention when they're under the weather. hee hee. I totally agree with you about not going to work when one doesn't feel well. I've caught many an illness from coworkers who won't go home when they're drooling germs all over the place! Sorry I was absent for a few days there... Anitra, www.iloveakiwi.com Dec. 21
	Kimberly wrote: I'm with you - I hate when people come to work (or go to the gym) sick. Please keep your germs at home. Even worse? People who send their kids to school sick. I mean, what the hell? I know mothers who load their kids up with tylenol and cough medicine and send their kids out the door because they don't want to deal with a sick kid all day. Can you believe that? Your reason #5 doesn't even begin to cover what they are. Dec. 17
	melisawrote: I'm the one who would not only stay home when she was sick but also take "mental health" days...also imperative to remaining healthy (and sane). Dec. 17
	Etanwrote: I'm also one who stays home when I'm sick even when I wasn't getting paid for it... not because I didn't want to get anyone else sick because I don't like 98% of the rude jerks I work with, but just because my head doesn't work when even alittle off. I'm like a finely tuned machine that doesn't start if the ashtray is too full or the radio is staticy. Dec. 16

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